March 26th Transfer Day

WOW!!! We are well beyond the 10,000 views mark now!! How exciting!!! I never imagined that this blog would have so much traffic because I could NEVER have imagined the level of support we would have through this journey!  It is truly AMAZING!!! We are so thankful for your thoughts and prayers!

This step of our journey started with leaving town at 4:15 on Wednesday and heading to Rockford.  We had to make it to the hotel in time to prepare for my two injections at 7:00 p.m.  It was BY FAR the earliest that we have ever been in Rockford.  We got there in time for the injections and we went out for dinner at Ruby Tuesdays.  While there we got information about an amazing pizza place, Lino's, so we also ordered a small pizza to eat with my late night meds!! Everything was delicious!!  So glad we tried the pizza place!!

I actually went to bed early on Wednesday night! I think I might have been asleep by 10:15!  That is NOT normal for me!  I was up several times in the night and finally realized that my side of the bed was inflating as the night went on, making me uncomfortable.  The beds at the Radisson are Sleep Number beds and we haven't always had the best luck with them.  Once I fixed it I slept much better.  But, it was inflated again by morning.  When Mike woke up he said that he had the worst night of sleep EVER.  I checked his side and it said that it was at a 100!!! WHAT!!! That is like a ROCK!!! I tried to put it down and it reinflated to a 75.  He said I was doing something to make it infate, but I promise that I wasn't!!!

We got ready for the procedure and went for breakfast... yes, McVey's like to eat.  We were finished with breakfast 30 minutes before we needed to be at the facility.  So, we arrived about 20 minutes early.  We sat down in the office and just like the times before we were greeted by the sign that said to let someone know if we waited longer than 25 minutes and the camera.  BUT, suddenly a girl that we had never met came out and said, "Can I help you?"  We were SO confused! I told her that we were early, but we were supposed to be there at 10:30.  She said, "And you are?"  I told her that we were Julie and Michael McVey and then I began to panic!!!! They had initially given us the wrong date... what if they hadn't fixed it and they still had us down for the 27th instead of the 26th?!?!?! The lady said, "Okay, I will let them know that you are here."  and she walked away.  Then a nurse we recognized peeked through the door, said hi, and went back to the back.  It was SO strange.  We will never know what all of that was about, but it was super weird!  Embryos only take 45 minutes to thaw, so who knows if they had the right date or not!! There was totally time to thaw them before they transferred them!!! ;) HAHAH!! I am sure we were just over reacting, but it is a good story anyway!! :)

Once we were called back I asked the nurse "J" if she could look at my injection sites because I had some redness/possible beginning of hives.  She acted like I was crazy for worrying and I reminded her that I have had serious reactions to the meds previously.  She still acted like I was crazy and then repeatedly pushed on my bruises and red spots.  She said to just keep watching them.  Then she went over the post transfer directions.  The first thing I had to do was let her know that the meds on the sheet were not right.  There was one med on there that I don't take and one that was left off that I do take.  I told her about that and then I looked at the pregnancy test date and told her that it was incorrect.  It said that I was supposed to have my pregnancy test on April 3rd, which is next Friday and I knew that couldn't be right.  She told me that it was right and that it had to do with my embryos.  I told her that it was not the same amount of time that had passed before and she put me off again and left the room.  So, when the next nurse came in ("T", who I just LOVE) I asked her about it.  She said that it was right and that it was the date for blastocysts.  I told her that my embryos were day 3.  She said that they weren't.  I said that they were and that the only way that they were blastocysts were if they were thawed early without my knowledge.  She said, "Let me check with the embryologists about this.  They would be the people who know!" When she came back she said that I was right and that she was really glad that I spoke up.  She then left to change my paperwork and the orders for my blood test.  She came back and said again that it was good that I spoke up and said to always question things when they don't seem right.  If there is one thing that I have learned from this journey it is to speak up and be my own advocate.  Not long ago I would NEVER have questioned a doctor.  Now I feel like I do it ALL the time!! So, they said that we would be getting started anytime, but the doctor tends to get lost on his way to the rooms so it could be a while.  And it was.  I think we started about 15 to 20 minutes late.

I have to say that though the procedures are never comfortable this time was extremely uncomfortable.  The only thing I can think of is that I was concerned about the issues that had occured with the mistakes and therefore I was tense, causing the procedure to be worse than usual.  He had to tell me to relax and I hadn't even noticed that I was tense.  Before long we were ready for the embryologists to bring in our little ones and he watched on the ultrasound screen and found the "good spot" to transfer them.  Then the embryologists confirmed that the tube was clear and that the embros had been successfully transfered! Then it was time for the 30 minute wait.  I asked him if he was born in Poland and that led to a 28 minute conversation about Poland and the fact that he moved to the USA when he was 28 and the conversation was actually really nice!  I was very surprised at how personable he was!  He told me to "Go home and Get PRegnant!" Then the nurse came in and said that we only had 2 more minutes to wait.  She also asked Mike to change the clock because he is tall and they still hadn't sprung forward! He said that with the amount of money we pay he didn't think he needed to do that and then he said that we should get a free copay out of it! HAHA!! But, he is a great guy, so he fixed the clock for them.  And finally it was time for me to hit the restroom!!! The crazy thing is that I had to pee SOOO bad that I couldn't go.  This is something that sometimes happens due to my endometriosis and it FREAKS me out.  I have to stand up and move around and hope that I can go.  I can then usually go a little bit, but if I wait a couple minutes I can usually go again.  I asked about this at an appointment once and the doctor told me to try not to let my bladder get too full in order to avoid this. Sadly this procedure requires a full bladder so I had no choice.  The only reason I mention it here is because it is something that most people probably don't realize about endometriosis... not only does it cause us to feel like we have to go to the restroom more frequently, but if we don't it can cause other issues! I know it is totally TMI, but if people start to notice restroom issues like I am describing it could be a sign of either endometriosis or a cyst/tumor of some type and it could become serious!

After hitting the bathroom up twice we hit the road and headed for home!  Of course we stopped in Sterling/Rock Falls for lunch!! I was so ready to get home and get some sleep!  So, when we got home I took a nap.  This whole process is SO exhausting.  We did our evening shots and Mike got me dinner so that I could take my meds that need to be taken with food.  Then I napped again and watched some t.v. Bed rest is such a riveting time!!! The awesome thing was that an AMAZING friend stopped over with Scotcheroos, which were a great treat to have with my late night meds!!! :)  Yum!! Yum!! It was so nice to visit with her!

I spent today feeling pretty nauseous. I don't know why, but I am assuming it is due to the hormones. I spent the day napping, eating, and watching HGTV!  Then an awesome friend stopped by and kept me company when she got out of school!! I appreciated the visit!! Mike came home and brought me dinner and gave me my injections.  Now I am working on grad class stuff and paying bills.  Super exciting Friday night!!!

We can't thank you all enough for all of your thoughts and prayers!  I thought I was going to find out if we were pregnant on Mike's sister's birthday, but they said that we will actually find out Monday, April 6th.  Thankfully I will not have school that day.  It is so hard to get the news and then have to go right back to teaching... so far I have only had negative news, but I am sure it would be hard even if it were positive news. Afterall, I would probably be doing backflips if the news was different this time!!! :)

Have a wonderful weekend! I am sure I will post updates about any "symptoms" that I feel!!! :)

So emotional!!!

I cannot believe how emotional I am this cycle.  So many tears.  It is definitely way worse than the last few cycles and I blame the high amount of estrogen they have me on.  Obviously the meds are doing what they are supposed to do, but I can't watch a show on t.v. without soaking my shirt with tears! Just sitting here typing this has me in tears... why?!?! No clue!! HAHAH!! No idea at all!  I am just THAT emotional right now.  I cried several times yesterday just from posts on Facebook!  Tears of joy, tears because of the compassion of others, tears that I couldn't explain!  It truly is bizarre!!!

I had my last leuprolide injection this morning and I start my first progesterone injection tomorrow night.  We realized that I am starting the projesterone earlier this cycle than I have in previous cycles.  I am not sure why that is happening, but hopefully it will be a change that helps us get a different result than we have had previously!

Speaking of progesterone... I think I have figured out a sign of my allergic reactions to the progesterone in oil that occurs before the hives... I have been doing rump injections for a couple weeks now and I have only had 1 bruise.  The bruise looks just like a bruise I would get on my arm or leg.  The "bruises" I got from my previous progesterone shots looked NOTHING like them.  They were deep and ugly.  I think they were actually signs of the allergic reaction.  So, I am going to watch for that and call and ask about it to see if it is possible that it a sign of allergic reaction and therefore a way that we can detect an allergy before it gets so severe!  This whole thing is so crazy.  They have a hard time understanding why my reaction gets so bad AFTER I stop the injections without any signs, so I am constantly trying to figure out a way to detect the allergy earlier!

We will head to Rockford after school on Wednesday and we will implant at about 11:00 Thursday.  They told us that we have to be there at 10:30 and reminded me to have a full bladder.  My response was that the full bladder requirement was worse than all the injections! The nurse said that she hears that alot!!! I am not surprised that other people have the same complaint!  It is such an uncomfortable feeling to go through the procedure with the full bladder, but then the wait afterward is torture!  Luckily, it is only about 30 minutes.  But at the time it is awful and there is nothing I can do to distract myself enough to make it better!  UGH! Can you tell that I am dreading the full bladder part of this process!?!?!?  HAHAH!!

Thursday is Mike's mom's birthday.  Then, if my calculations are correct, we should find out on his sister's birthday if the cycle was successful.  These significant dates should be a good sign, right?!??!?! :)

I hope you all have had a wonderful weekend!

Ultrasound Wednesday!

Today we had our Ultrasound.  Last cycle we ended up scheduling another ultrasound when we were at this appointment because I had had some bleeding.  THIS cycle the doctor told the med students that I had a PERFECT example of a triple stripe lining!!! He said that not only is my lining a "Type A", but he gives it an A+!!!! Everyone was so happy for us.  I guess this lining is pretty fabulous!  I hope our little embryos get the memo and decide to settle in for a wonderful 9 month stay!  So, they gave me my meds protocol for the rest of the cycle and we will go to Rockford on Thursday the 26th for our transfer.

Thank you for your continued support!! We will need all of the positive thoughts and prayers that we can get as we approach the transfer.  Something seems to happen after the transfer that just isn't quite right.  We hope that the new protocol will fix that!

Funny thing happened today... there were too many med students... the nurse couldn't come in.  So, the doctor had to attempt to change the probe cover to a latex free cover on his own.  He said that the nurse was really testing him today.  I said, "Nope, she is just showing you how hard she works around here!"  HAHAH!!!

Also, a moment to share about always questioning when you think something doesn't sound right to you.  #1 - The probe cover... I thought it looked like latex, so I asked about it.  They weren't upset.  They changed it right away.  It saved me from lots of itching and discomfort!  Not long ago I would have been afraid to inconvience them.  Now I know that this is my health and I am my best advocate. #2 -  When they gave me my protocol I felt that there was an error.  It said that I would have my transfer on Friday the 27th.  I nicely stated that it was different than I thought it should be.  But, I didn't push too hard because I thought it could have been changed due to our meds arriving late and doing my first injection in the afternoon instead of in the morning.  NO... I was right!! The nurse called me on the way home and said that she was so thankful that I had said something when I didn't think it was the right date.  The spreadsheet had an extra day on it for some reason and it was wrong.  I DO transfer on Thursday the 26th.  She thanked me multiple times for bringing it to their attention.  I share these things because this journey has taught me that we have to be our own advocates and that we are the only people who are truly effected by any mistakes that may come up.  Never be afraid to stand up for yourself or question something that effects you or the outcome you are hoping for!

Have a great day!!

What a beautiful Saturday!

I just love this beautiful weather!  It is just what I need as we continue through this journey.  I am happy to report that my rump is not in NEARLY as much pain!!! It is still not normal, but it is SOOO much better than it was... other than the fact that I get an injection in it every night!! HAHA!! The nurse was right, the cold weather wasn't letting it absorb and I wasn't able to spend enough time on the heating pad to help it out.

Today I spent some time in Galesburg.  Jaclyn waxed my eyebrows (they were SOOOO bad!!), I went to lunch at LaGondola (absolutely delicious!), and I stopped at Maurice's.  Sadly, it is time to invest in a new pair of jeans.  My favorite jeans have a thigh rip. :(  BOO!!! And, if I am being honest, it is time to go up a jeans size. :/  Yep, with each cycle I have gained weight and this cycle is no different.  Since we have not taken time off between cycles my body hasn't had time off of the meds to try to lose some of the weight, so it is just compounding. :(  I have read about this on a lot of IVF forums and they say that it has to do with the hormones.  Most people say that they are eating healthy and working out as much as all of the restrictions allow, but people report gaining anywhere from 5-10 pounds per cycle to 20, 30, even 35 pounds!!! Some lucky people don't gain any weight... I do my best not to hate the people who make posts stating that they haven't gained anything and they feel fabulous!!! ;)  The reason I am posting about this is because it is a total bummer to already feel icky about everythig IVF and then feel icky about your body, too!! I want people going through it to realize that they are not alone!! I keep saying things like, "I guess I need to quit feeding my feelings... pants are getting tight."  But, the truth is that other than when I was on the steroids (WOAH that was an intense hunger!!!!) I have not been a crazy eater. I am not using this as an excuse to binge.  No, I am not a fan of a lot of "healthy" foods, so you won't see me eating weird, healthy things... but this weight gain is not from nonstop snacking/binge eating!  I think I thought it was easier to face the additional pounds by joking about it, but I guess I was only kidding myself!  SO, I bought a new pair of jeans (not the cutest, but they will do) and accepted the fact that for the second time since we started these cycles I have less of a wardrobe! It is hard to look in the mirror and see the changes that are occuring.  The scars from the surgeries, the flubby stomach that used to be flat... that was one thing I had going for me... my thighs were ginormous, but at least my stomach was flat!!!! Not anymore! But... in the grand scheme of things I have to remind myself that it isn't really the end of the world.  Life can change in an instant and I am fairly certain that gaining a few pounds isn't nearly as catastrophic as other things that could be happening.  Perspective is key! 

When I got home I took a little snooze... I am definitely trying to fight off some type of upper respiratory thing, but I am taking dexamethasone to suppress my immune system so sleep and vitamins are my best bet right now.  I truly hope that the dexamethasone helps to keep my body from attacking our babies, but I also hope that I don't end up really sick because of the compromised immune system.  It was definitely something that I had to talk my doctor into trying and as long as I can take care of myself I am sure it will be the right move!!! Pretty sure at least!! ;)  It is kind of scary to think of the things I am willing to try in order to make this happen... When I sit back and think about what these meds could be doing to my body it is terrifying.  I had to stop reading the warning labels.  They seriously give me nightmares.  BUT, then I think about the fact that people have been doing this for years and I use my drug interaction website religiously to make sure that I don't mix anything that I shouldn't.  It is really a life saver... literally!! There have been days when it stopped me from making BIG mistakes!!! :) 

Then I helped Mike wax the Buick!  I couldn't believe how wonderful the weather was this afternoon!  It was such a beautiful day!  I was outside in a short sleeve top and capris!!!! Yes, I realize that was probably a little silly... it isn't even spring yet.  But, I need all the Vitamin D I can get.  I haven't been able to take my supplements in a LONG time!!! I NEED the sun!!!!!

Now I am making enchiladas and getting ready for my 7 p.m. injection.

As I was getting ready to write this entry I had Mike guess the number of visits our blog has had. He guessed 2,000.  I laughed because he was SO far off.  We have had over 9,500 visits to our blog.  Over 9,500!!! AMAZING!!! We have so many fabulous people following this journey and that doesn't include the visits from my account.  It also doesn't include Mike because he admited to me that he doesn't know how to get on it! HAHAHA!! He said that when people ask him what I meant by something on the blog he has no idea because he has never read it. :/ Oh my... I guess I need to give him a lesson on how to get to this blog so he knows how I am feeling from time to time!! HAHAH!! Then again, maybe it is actually better if I wait and show him the blog AFTER we are all the way through this process!!! ;)

Thank you again for your support and prayers.  We are getting so much closer to the big day.  We will find out on Wednesday if we are all set for a transfer on Thurs. the 26th.

Enjoy this beautiful weather!!!!! 

March 12, 2013

In the last 24 hours I have had many people stop me and ask for an update. I didn't realize that I hadn't posted my updates to Facebook the last few times that I wrote.  I apologize for that and I thank you for checking in on me!

I don't have a lot to report right now except to say that we are doing everything they have told us to and hoping that things go well from here!  We have realized that neither of us enjoys the rump shots any more than we did last time! ;)  Poor Mike hates giving them just as much as I hate to have them given to me!! He probably hates it more actually... I have kind of just resigned myself to the fact that it is going to hurt, but it will get better and it will be worth it... Although last night's injection was abnormally painful/stung and Mike noticed my cringing... again, probably worse for him because he knew he had to do something that hurt me.  

We go back to the doctor next Wednesday to see if the meds are doing what they are supposed to do.  I am sure they will also give me an update on the cysts.  Hopefully they are the same size, smaller, or gone.  We will see what they say! 

Thank you for being such awesome supporters!  We appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers!  We appreciate that you check in on us and cheer for us. This has been quite a journey, but your support has been amazing! 

More meds tomorrow.

Tomorrow I start more medications.  It is always makes me a bit nervous when I start a new part of the protocol because the meds are so time sensitive and I have a fear of forgetting to take something or taking something late.  In the morning I will still do my 7 a.m. injection.  I will add two estrogen pills, a low dose asprin, and dexamethasone.  In the evening I will start an estrogen rump injection, two additional estrogen pills, and I will continue taking bromocryptine.  Plus I have to continue my prescription prenatal vitamin.  I feel like it is a lot of pills, but hopefully the change in protocol will be exactly what we need for this cycle to be successful.  I will have an appointment on the 18th to make sure that my lining is doing what it should.  At some point that week I will add a progesterone rump shot to the list.

This cycle has been different.  I have had a lot of cramping since going off of the pill and only doing the luprolide injection.  I have my period now, which they say is what is supposed to happen.  It didn't happen in previous cycles, so hopefully this is a good sign.  I told Mike that I don't think it is fair that I have to give myself shots and I feel sick from cramps, headache, back pain, etc...!! But, if this cycle works out it will all be worth it! (Ugh, that kinda made me sick to type... I totally believe it, but I feel like I keep saying it OVER and OVER!)  

I have to admit that I am nervous about starting rump injections again.  I am still having a reaction to the oil, so I am not sure how these injections will go.  I am not worried about a reaction because it is estrogen, not progesterone in oil... but, I am worried that it will be extra painful because of the irritated skin. Then, the fact that I start the progesterone in oil shots again soon has me totally freaked out.  They said that each reaction typically gets worse.  I don't even want to imagine a worse reaction than the last one.

As we get closer to the date of our transfer I am getting nervous.  I really wasn't in a good place after the last cycle failed.  I was a real mess both emotionally and physically.  I feel like I am still in denial of this cycle.  I am not at an excited stage/nervous stage for the actual transfer yet.  I am nervous about the protocol, but I feel like it is WAY too early to start thinking about Rockford, yet! So much still has to happen before we get to that point.

It's March and we are moving forward!

After I published my last blog post I got a call from the IVF coordinator telling me that we got the approval for the medications and that I needed to call the pharmacy right away because two of the medications for my protocol are in shortage.  So, I called as soon as I hung up with her and I found out that I was able to get one of the medications that was in shortage and that the other one was not only in shortage, but was being discontinued and no longer manufactured! WHAT?!?!? CVS no longer had any in stock. We finished up the process of ordering the meds that they had (Placed the order for the luprolide to be sent over night) and then I called the IVF coordinator back.  I told her the news and she said that she would start making calls to see if she could find a pharmacy that still had some of the medication in stock that Health Alliance approves.  She called back a couple hours later and let me know that she had found a place on the East Coast! That pharmacy called me back within an hour or so.  I became nervous when the woman said that she hadn't heard of Health Alliance.  She took my information and told me that someone would get back to me within 48 hours to let me know if the meds were approved.  Thankfully I got a call the next day that they got approval and I will get the medication on Tuesday!

So, we waited all day on Friday.  Mike stayed home because it was too cold to have the meds sitting outside and we didn't know what time the meds would arrive.  So, when the meds arrived a little after 2:00 Mike brought them out to the school and I did my injection in the teacher's lounge! Not ideal, but I was just very thankful that we were able to get the injections and stay on track.  After school I took off to Iowa to visit the Kulows and meet my niece, Dolcey!

At this point I am nervous about this cycle, but excited for the opportunity to move forward.  I am hopeful that things will work out, but I am also nervous to be too hopeful.

Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers as we faced such uncertainty!  We have such an amazing group of people supporting us and we are SO thankful for all of you!